I never expected to fall in love with this place. I'm still not sure that I am. All I know is that I rather enjoy nap drives here. Everyday around 1pm I throw the boys in the car (but only if they won't get in themselves) and just start driving. No destination, no specific route and I find myself for one, not getting lost like I expect to, and two, overwhelmed by the beauty of the scenery. Not just the rolling hills salted with farms and country houses, fields, and trees... Even the art of the road is a thing of beauty. The road respects the land, does not plow right through it with its own interest, but even seems to compliment and honor the graceful flow of the geography. I'm surprised by my instant adoration of this place. I have yet to meet a local (give me a break I've been sick since I got here) and downtown left much to be desired. Yet the character is unmistakable, the unique quality unavoidable. I can only imagine how my affections will grow once spring comes.
In other matters, I find myself rather lonely. This was expected however. How many times can I say to my distant friends, "I miss you so much!" before realizing that I have nothing else to say. No "let's hang out today" or "do you wanna come over tomorrow?" I don't know what to do with that. It's like breaking up with your friends... Sorry I can't see you anymore. I really didn't think it would end so soon... And the inevitable heartbreak. So I'm in a new kind of limbo now: friend limbo. Caught between leaving the old friends behind (so to speak) and meeting new friends here. It's an uncomfortable space to live in.
Through all this God has been good to me. The 38 hour or so drive from Phoenix couldn't have gone more smoothly - even the bad book was enjoyable when shared with my sis! My kids were astonishingly well-behaved. We encountered no detours or traffics issues. No inclement weather or vehichle problems. Where is my darn shirt! lol. It's a God thing. And call me crazy, but I count my eternal monster head cold as a blessing. It's like God saying, "OK you are home now. Just rest for a week. Just rest and don't stress." Man, I love our God!
Life is crazy where I left it. For whatever reason, I've always been submersed in a calm place flittering in and out of other people's stressful situations. Surely I'm blessed. And naturally I've had difficulties in my life, but God has always lifted me out of it unscathed. In fact, only improved I'd say, and what's better, with a deeper sense of gratitude and awe at our Almighty Father.
My prayer for you is that you fall in love with the beauty of God around you. That you easily identify those moments in which you can say "It's a God thing!" That God lift you out of your troubles with a sense of awe at His plan for your life. For all you LOST fans out there.... "Don't tell me what GOD can't do!"
peace and love
Kate
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