Friday, July 24, 2009

Bottom line

Maybe we should've let Texas become its own state. Maybe Lincoln should've let the south secede from the Union. Maybe somebody at some point should've notice that our nation got too big for one government. The state governments are great ideas... but, alas, the federal government oversees them as well. Freedom is diminishing at an astounding rate... and all in the name of what?

I'm not going to weigh in about the universal healthcare plan. Not here. Nor will I rant about the enormity of the government growing like cancer across our rights. This is what I will say, God wins. That's a bottom line I can get behind!

Meanwhile, I wonder what this all means for every day people like me (I don't know about every other day people...). Should our goals change? Were they worthy goals to begin with? What of the American dream? .... the American dream... freedom to pursue our lives in peace, uninhibited by outside pressures or restrictions. What do we have now? The American Entitlement? Have we all been reduced to sniveling 5 year olds? IT'S NOT FAIR! wahhhhhhhh! Those darn CareBears at it again...

And I know, I know it's the natural progression of things once God is slowly yet purposefully removed from authority of any kind. But it's sad to see it happen to this country. A nation that God blessed so much... thrown back in His face with spiteful ingratitude. That He hasn't completely anihilated us yet is beyond me.

But I digress (or regress?)... What is our focus? Our goals as christian Americans? It seems at least to me that the pursuit of stability may eventually compromise our beliefs. We may in our lifetime have to encounter situations now where we will have to break our nation's laws in order to uphold our Maker's. With the world and our country in it's current situation... what should be our focus? I know that the main point never changes: tell the world about Jesus. This could get tricky and something tells me (as Mark Martin does) the roof is on fire! This is urgent... we need to act NOW. Busyness needs to give way to a purpose filled life. Not the Rick Warren way - the Jesus way.

Lord, guide us to serve you in every way. Move us to live as though there won't be a later - no retirement - just a now. Give us clear purpose in our every day lives. Fill your people with the passion to bring your kids back to you. Help us eliminate distractions that waste our time and energy, remove negative influences so that we may hear your voice clearly. Let us be wakeful watchful for we know you are coming soon, Jesus! Fill our discouragements and cynicism with your everlasting hope. Renew our strength each day and measure our steps with confidence. In your holy name, we pray AMEN

Saturday, July 11, 2009

There are so many things on my blanketed mind, like sand drifting through my fingers... ahh, the beach.

Abby's visit was absolutely awesome! I couldn't be more thankful for friends that have known me half my life, go without talking to each other for 9 years and pick up right where we left off. I am so grateful to have that memory with me... hanging out at the Thiels with the cutest baby ever - Aida Rose. The National Zoo, Rehoboth Beach in Delaware, downtown Annapolis and Hagerstown stomach-dropping roads that made Abby scream!

Not even a month later and suddenly our lives are thrown into change AGAIN. I won't complain. I won't mourn the 8th move in our nearly 8 years of marriage. I am amazed and awed by the love of our God. His will and purpose for us is being revealed to us the further we go on... in His timing.

Just this past Tuesday, Dan arrived at work only to be kindly escorted from the building with possessions in hand. Suspension, they said, with termination imminent. They gave him the option to resign, which he promptly did. At peace, he said, over the whole ordeal. Five days later and still no regrets. God has paved our path and more than ever we are seeing what a blessing it is to trust fully in Him and walk forward in faith.

You see, just two weeks ago, my sister and I were on the phone, a common occurrance as the topic of living closer to one another was also. In the past this conversation would go on wistfully, hypothetically and end with a sigh as reality overcame us. However, this time it would not go that way. We both suddenly got the idea that it could happen! Why not, I said? Dan hates his job, he's always wanted to live near them as well! why not indeed.... I told Marie to pitch the idea to Dan (believe me it makes sense that way). Sure enough, he was on board.

From that point, Dan and I concocted a plan: I would promptly move to El Paso or Phoenix with the boys and the dogs. Dan would remain in Frederick working and living in a 1 bedroom apartment saving up money. This past Monday Dan signed a 4 month lease and we went home content with our plan. Well God had a different idea....

After Dan called me from his Jeep on the way from work... my mind was reeling. No income (save his VA disability check). No job. And on the 31st.. no home. Dan was at peace. He wasn't angry even though his employer had gone back on his word (approving leave that he was now saying was too much time from work). He had told me a couple months back that the people he worked with were a godless bunch, greedy and self-motivated. He was uncomfortable there and his skill set was at odds with the position he held.

We easily got out of his 4 month lease. (Thank God for that!) And began packing... We still are packing. And every day we see God's hand in this. Yesterday, as we were clearing up the garage, Dan looked over and me and said "Let's have a yard sale tomorrow." I said "ok." We readied the garage for the event, posting it on craigslist, and with the help of Dan's old army buddy, we were up and open at 8am this morning.

Jim, our awesome neighbor came strolling over asked us what we were up to. He said most garage sales do better on Fridays here and earlier, too. I said, well it can't hurt to try. Seconds after that conversation, our first customer walked up. We had a steady stream of people coming through all day. The couch, end tables, dresser, valet, sheets, baby clothes, stroller, army stuff, lamps, tv... and lots of other stuff were bought. By 1:30 Dan and I were both pooped and ready to park our butts inside (it was oppressively humid out today). We gave it a half hour more and then shut the garage. Not even 10 minutes later, it started pouring! It was like God's approval after all our hard work :)

I'm busting out of Maryland in 4 days and I can hardly believe. My darling brother Kyle will be keeping me company as we traverse across the country once again.

I'm just in such awe of God's love and His amazing involvement in our personal lives. That He works so purposefully in each of our lives to draw us to Him and toward our purpose in Him... it's astounding!

I'm really looking forward to this next phase of our lives. He has grown us so much out here and we are so blessed in every way. And I am so incredibly blessed to have Dan as my husband... he is an amazing man and I'm always surprised (though I shouldn't be) by how God is working in him and through him.

So tonight... I'm thinking sitting cuddling tv watching with my man... and some peace and quiet. Cheers y'all!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Junk yard musings

Listening to Audrey Assad who I found in a roundabout way of link pasting.

Reading about Kate McRae... the amazing little girl who inspired the whole world to pray for her and write songs for her, worship God in honor of her. I pray that she is healed and the whole world sees how mighty the hand of our God is.. and how gracious He is to listen to us.

I need to pack. Again. When did destinations stop being destinations? Instead just another pit stop... for who knows how long? How do people live in one place for decades? Why are we so nomadic? Well, you can't say we are afraid of change :)

The world is a cruel place for talent. Even if we find the thing we are good at only one person can be the best at it and then even that position is fickle relying on the whims of society, trends of an indecisive humanity. As a christian we know our talent is for God, to praise Him to bring Him glory. Something no one talks about is how we know if we are doing that adequately or not. Is it measured by the acceptence of others? Will we be affirmed by human confirmation? Is it only effective if the results are visible? This is a difficult presupposition to overcome.

I see miracles all around me. The grace of God is a miracle all in itself. It's not that I cannot see results of God's hand. I still struggle with how I fit in that. I've learned that God in fact DOES listen to me, my prayers. I have absolutely no doubt about that. And I know that we are to use our uniqueness in traffic control. I don't have the answers, but I know who does.

Maybe I say too many words. Maybe I think too many thoughts. Maybe I should do as my mother does and secure a barrage of meaningful cliches. One of my favorites that I hung up on the door to the garage says "If it matters to you, it matters to Him." Pretty sure that was a Max Lucado.

Why can't I remember scripture? I've been reading the bible since I was able to read. I'm in it at least once a day. Ask me to recite a passage and everything I memorized in grade school, the chapters I had to know by heart in high school go flying out of my head. I wish I could. Good thing I love to read! Because I'm going to need to re-read the bible everytime I need God's words. Not a problem :)

I am a random junk yard of musings today... discarded thoughts revisited, thinking perhaps I can make something of my semi-abandoned ideas. Meh....